Have you ever made a decision based on fear? It’s a natural human instinct, but it can also hold us back from living our best lives. For cancer, this fear can be especially prevalent. There are valuable lessons about overcoming fear and making decisions from a place of strength.
Most people make decisions based on fear when it comes to cancer. You feel a lump then think of the worst-case scenario. Your doctor says, “This is a rare type and chemo doesn’t work to shrink the tumor,” or you made a decision but are scared to tell people.
I get it. That C-word is scary.
There are so many unknowns and you want to make the best decision for your body.
3 Tips To Help You Avoid Making Decisions Based on Fear:
- Confidence helps you overcome fears
- Notice people who use fear tactics
- Get to a place of joy
Tip 1: Confidence Helps You Overcome Fears
What helps you to feel confident? The dictionary says, “the feeling or belief that one can rely on someone or something; firm trust.” Think back to the last time you were scared. Fear can also look like feeling anxious, overwhelmed, insecure, insignificant, nervous, or rejected.
Yep. That’s all fear! What did you do to feel better?
Here are 5 Ways to overcome fears:
- You can ignore fears and push through them.
- “Knowledge is power” is your mantra. So you consult Doctor Google.
- Calling a friend to get prayer and be encouraged.
- Experience – talking to someone who went through this health challenge already.
- Read healing verses in the Bible.
I Got Educated and Became Confident Before a Diagnosis
In 2019, my mom went down the traditional route for cancer treatment for multiple myeloma but was open when I sent her the videos for The Truth About Cancer docuseries. This is the first time I learned about breast thermography. I thought, “That’s a good thing to do since my maternal grandmother died of breast cancer at age 62.”
My eyes were opened to alternative cancer treatments and prevention. I knew having 3 women die from cancer on my mom’s side; I needed to take my health more seriously and wanted my mom to build up her immune system too!
I was already eating paleo 90% of the time for a decade. I started doing 12-6 PM intermittent fasting and Whole30 as a normal routine when I was with my mom for most of 2020 until she also passed at age 62.
February 2021, during prayer I heard, “Take a break from drinking. Get thermography.” I kept hearing it over and over but ignored it by saying, “I don’t drink that much.”
In October 2021, I started hearing it again. “Take a break from drinking. Get thermography.” I asked one of my massage gals if she knew of a place. She said, “I work at a clinic doing breast thermography twice a month”!
John 16:13 – But when He, the Spirit of truth, comes, He will guide you into all the truth; for He will not speak on His own initiative, but whatever He hears, He will speak; and He will disclose to you what is to come. (NASB)
In November 2021, I met with Dr. Wendy Sellens at Pink Image in Solana Beach to go over my results. There was a spot to keep an eye on. I changed my diet to her Estrogen Free Lifestyle. When I have fear, I like control so going on a diet sounded and felt amazing! I liked that they were featured in The Truth About Cancer docuseries and Dr. Wendy had a book on Amazon, The Breast Thermography Revolution.
I felt confident and empowered! I had a plan, a team, and whatever this was, I’d be kicking its butt early.
Tip 2: Notice People Who Use Fear Tactics
You have the power to say, “I’ll think about it, I’ll check my schedule, or I’ll talk to my husband.” You don’t ever have to make a decision at the moment. Whether it’s an old school online marketer using fear tactics saying, “You have till the end of the business day or the price will double,” or a doctor saying, “It’s metastasized, this is aggressive, and you have 2 months to live so you need to do XYZ.”
The Bible says, “Selah.” That means pause. You see it a lot in the book of Psalms.
Psalms 62:8 – Trust in Him at all times, O people; Pour out your heart before Him; God is a refuge for us. Selah. (NASB)
Psalms 68:19 – Blessed be the Lord, who daily bears our burden, The God of our salvation. Selah. (NASB)
Take a pause. If you have a hard time reading the Bible or hearing from God, this app is helpful to pause whether you need a one-minute or ten-minute pause.
It took a while to get my GP to approve an ultrasound. She didn’t believe in the breast thermography test, I had no symptoms, and she couldn’t feel a lump on the spot where the thermography showed something was going on. I don’t remember what I said to change her mind, but she ordered me an ultrasound.
My GP was shocked that the breast thermography showed something in the same spot! She recommended a biopsy since that’s the protocol. I told her I’d rather get an MRI than a biopsy. She said she wouldn’t order one since that isn’t protocol.
This was the first time I experienced making decisions based on fear. She said, “I had another patient that didn’t get the biopsy, then 6 months later it spread everywhere. I don’t want that to happen to you.”
I decided to stick to the diet since I was feeling really good and couldn’t feel a lump.
In May, while waiting for the next thermography, ultrasound, and trying to get my GP to approve a breast MRI after feeling a lump, I met with my OB-GYN to go over blood work. He said, “Everything looks great and is in normal ranges.” But then I told him about the mass and how I wanted him to order me a breast MRI.
His tone changed. He used fear tactics, also saying, “If you were my wife, I’d tell you to get the biopsy.”
Thank goodness for a good friend Marie-Claire who shared the book, Cancer Isn’t a Disease It’s a Healing Mechanism. I felt so empowered and decided I won’t make a decision based on fear.
It seemed like there was no way around the biopsy. I couldn’t find a doctor to order me a breast MRI. How could my blood be normal? Feeling defeated, I scheduled the biopsy.
It came back negative for cancer. WOOT WOOT!!!
Fear of Man
I really had a hard time with fear of man. There are a lot of medical professionals in my family and really smart friends who love me.
The Bible describes the fear of man as a trap.
Proverbs 29:25 – The fear of man lays a snare, but whoever trusts in the Lord is safe.
I chose not to go public because I didn’t want to be influenced wrongly or disappoint people if I didn’t do their suggestions. I am also a business coach and copywriter, so I didn’t want our clients to worry or think things were falling apart with team Cortes.
It was team Jesus, Robert, and I.
Plus, a small group of friends and ladies from church knew and were praying for me.
I made my decisions but gave myself plenty of time to be confident before telling someone very opinionated what I chose because I knew there would be a battle of them trying to get me to change my mind.
Some people wouldn’t quit pushing. I set up a strong boundary of a no-communication break.
Then I’d do my routine to experience peace again. I’d call a friend crying; then they’d pray for me and encourage me with scripture. I felt joy on those phone calls and was grateful for having a supportive team.
Tip 3: Get to a Place of Joy
This is the tip I wish I had before that first biopsy in May 2022. I ended up getting two more biopsies of the same mass plus others. This a rare breast cancer and I was diagnosed at age 36. In San Diego, they only had experience with this type and two women over 80. So yea of course, I wanted to work with the best team! I went to 4 cancer centers across the US, meeting with a team of doctors; a breast surgeon, a plastic surgeon, and an oncologist.
I leaned hard on Tip #1 (be confident) and Tip #2 (don’t fall for fear tactics).
Evening Before and Day Of The Appointment (Punch Fear in the Throat Routine)
- I prayed that God would show me the truth during each appointment. That anyone I met would speak the truth. But most of the time I praised God and thanked Him getting to a place of gratitude that He guides me.
- I’d turn on a worship playlist on Spotify and praise God until an ad came on. Sometimes no ads would come on for an hour.
- I released trapped emotions following the book, The Emotion Code.
- I read the Bible or did a SOAP on a specific story (scripture, observe, application, pray).
- I’d play my quantum frequency routine while I stretched or foam rolled.
- I read books, listened to healing testimonies, and kept whatever I was learning positive. If I felt anger, stress, fear, or sadness then I’d turn it off.
This took me a couple of hours, sometimes longer, but it was worth it. This helped me to become peaceful.
From what I’ve learned, you can’t stop making decisions based on fear if you are experiencing more joy in your life.
Word For The Year
Yearly, I pray and pick a word and a Bible verse. This year I picked JOY. But hadn’t even looked up the definition or any Bible verses yet. A few weeks ago, a YouTube video on a different subject talked a lot about joy. Then a 2-part podcast on Joy and Peace. I realized both were talking about the same book, Joy Starts Here.
I know how you can have joy in the chaos and uncertainty of a cancer diagnosis.
Luke 6:23a – Rejoice in the day and leap for joy, beause great is your reward in heaven. (NIV)
God wants you well. He loves you so much more than you can even imagine. He never made you sick and doesn’t want you to stay sick.
You can’t experience joy on your own. Joy is only experienced with another person. You can experience happiness or excitement by yourself but not joy.
Here are some quotes from the book to help you with this paradigm shift of what joy is.
“If we start our life in fear we will feel anxious about almost everything. But the brain is bias to joy. Joy is our mostpowerful desire, and we are designed to seek joyful interactions from birth.”
“Joy makes us grow strong, loving relationships with other people. We love as a response to joy. Joy stimulates the growth of the identity region of our brains.”
“The practice of joy builds brain strength and the capacity to engage life with energy, creativity, and endurance. In fact, the capacity for the brain to engage every intense or difficutl aspect of life develops out of joy.
“High-joy people are very resilient. High-joy communities are are energetic and productive enen in hard times.”
“With joy, we are empowered to find creative, mutually satisfying solutions for problems and love to create simply because we can.” – Page 8, Joy Starts Here
I hope and pray that you never make decisions based on fear again. Pause and get to a place of joy with a friend (or Jesus) and be confident before saying, “yes, let’s do it!”
You have one body. You are made in God’s image. You have to believe in whatever healing treatment you choose. I believe God will guide you to what is best for your body, spirit, and soul. It may look like what everyone else does or different.
If you missed my first blog of these series and you want to read encouraging healing Bible verses, click here I Am Healed Because He Said So.